Have you ever thought about why people make the same mistakes over and over again? It doesn’t matter whether they only have a high school diploma or a university degree, all of them are guilty of making stupid mistakes. But the fact is that there are certain truths in life that many people refuse to accept, instead they choose to go around in circles.
Bright Side decided to consult Quora and find out which common stereotypes prevent us from living freely and make us repeat the same mistakes over and over again.
1. When you forgive all the time, you help evil stay unpunished.
Some people believe that only forgiveness can help us start a new day with pure thought and spirit. But no one mentions that there are actually 2 types of forgiveness. Spiritual. This type of forgiveness helps us to overcome our own worries and find peace inside ourselves. It is directed inward and not outward toward those who offended us. So, with this type of forgiveness we don’t exactly try to forgive, but instead we try to stay away from blame. It is noble, useful, and necessary. Behavioral. This type of forgiveness is about our attitude toward the person that offended us. Unfortunately, when we forgive someone once or a number of times, we help them to believe that their actions will remain unpunished. So, it’s up to us to decide whether to forgive them or not.
2. God will never call your phone.
With this dramatic topic, we wanted to say that no one and nothing will come and save you from your own life. The best example here is The Zero Theorem movie directed by Terry Gilliam. The main character of the movie spends his days literally sitting near a phone and waiting for a call from God who will reveal the meaning of life to him. But eventually the main character realizes that God will never call him. Those who saw this movie needed 2 hours of screen time to understand this truth. However, many of us still can’t accept it until the end of our lives. Perhaps we’re waiting for a miracle or at least a sign that will tell us what we are meant to be. However, you should always remember that God will never call your phone.
3. Failure is necessary.
Somewhat paradoxically, many successful people have achieved success thanks to their failures because those failures made them stronger. You can find stories like this in any biography or biopic. Stephen King, for example, had a special nail above his desk where he pinned his rejection letters and he had dozens of them. Statistically speaking, 95% of people with the same talent as Stephen King would say, “OK, this occupation is probably not for me,” after being rejected so many times. The remaining 5% are the Stephen Kings of their industries who never give up despite the rejections. That’s how the selection process of success works.
4. Money is still important.
Older generations like to repeat that money is not the most important thing in the world. Money can’t give us happiness, love, or health. But let’s all admit that we have a much higher chance of being happy, loved, and healthy with money, rather than without it. We also have higher chances of traveling around the world, fulfilling our dreams, finding our loved ones, and supporting charity activities. But when we have to count every single cent, it is much more difficult to make our dreams come true.
5. Even our biggest failure has an excuse.
Our brain does an amazing job of finding any excuse for us when we are too lazy or afraid to do something. When we’re afraid to change the company we work for, we say that we need stability. When we’re afraid of a professional opinion, we call it pride. When we can’t achieve our dreams, we say we’re not talented enough. And when we can’t wake up early in the morning, we say that we’re taking care of our health. So as you can see, we come up with a lot of excuses for avoiding things we don’t like or are afraid of. If we pay attention to this ability of our brain and fight it, we will have a better chance of becoming successful.
6. Being a “Yes” person is not the best rule to follow.
The movie called Yes Man starring Jim Carrey made openness and a positive reaction to everything new, trendy, while a “No” answer began to seem like something that was negative and destructive. As a matter of fact, a “No” answer isn’t connected with negativity. It actually shows our willpower and our ability to rationally select the people and events we want to deal with. Actually we need to know both how to say “Yes” and how to say “No.”
7. You are not the unluckiest person in the world.
All of us probably have friends who stay positive and funny despite their serious problems, for example, a young daughter who has to give away all of her money to support her ill parents, or a groom who has become a widower overnight, or an old lady who supports her big and ungrateful family. They may seem happy because they don’t want to show their problems. That’s why when you’re desperate, remember that you’re not the only one who has problems. And other people’s problems can be much more serious than yours.
8. All people wear masks.
We behave in a different way when we are at work, with our family, and with our friends. We wear different masks depending on the environment so that we can fit into the necessary conditions. That’s why you shouldn’t be surprised when your colleague turns out to be a different person than you thought she was. She’s not a hypocrite, she just changed her mask which was not supposed to be seen by you.
9. It’s worth reconsidering our list of friends.
Our friends are a very valuable resource and they become even more valuable as we grow older. At school, we could have dozens of friends, but after 30, we can count the number of friends on one hand. It can sometimes be hard for us to lose our old friends because no one’s perfect, right? There are actually 2 types of friends who are definitely not perfect for us: Those who bring us down. For example, those who always have a lot of problems and complaints that they need us to solve for them. And even though we might feel sorry for those people, it’s better to delete them from our friend list. Those who turn away from us when we need them the most. Once you manage to sort out all of your issues by yourself, don’t forget to let this friend go forever.
10. No one has the same way of thinking as you do.
Teenagers aren’t wrong in thinking that no one can understand them. Actually none of us in the world can fully understand one another because we all see the world from our own unique angle. So, don’t go crazy when your loved ones can’t comprehend seemingly obvious things.
11. Everyone you know uses you in one way or another.
It might sound strange but we all use each other in one way or another. An employer uses our resources, our lover uses our emotions and body, our friends use our connections, our helpful personality, our ability to have fun, or our ability to lend them money, actually anything… Our best friend can even be with us because she needs our support, company, and everyday communication. So, you need to realize that people don’t stay around you just because you’re a nice and cute person. Your mother is the only one who feels this way about you.
Would you like to add some other truths to this list? Let’s enlarge the picture of our harsh reality together.